C.G.Ayling

Category: General

General Topics

  • INFP, this, is me!

    Isn’t it is fascinating how long it takes us to learn about ourselves?

    Only yesterday I found myself looking at the Twitter profile of a virtual acquaintance who has had a tremendous impact on me. @DaveGrigger included a personality profile as part of his Twitter Biography that revealed he is an INTP. A while ago I did a free Myers-Briggs profile test and discovered that my personality profile is INFP, my particular breakdown is Introversion – 78%, Intuition – 62%, Feeling – 16%, Perceiving – 49%.

    If you haven’t taken this profile test I strongly encourage you to, it is completely free and very well worth the time you’ll spend. I found it fascinating to learn that some of the things we intuitively know about ourselves are more than just in our mind.

    Anyway… I’ve known for a long time that I am an INFP, but thanks to David Grigger, I revisited myself and did a little research into something I have never considered before. Simply put, the results astonished to me.

    What am I talking about? About how my personality type affects my writing.

    Characteristics of writers with the INFP personality profile.
    General characteristics of writers with the INFP personality profile.

    First, I found the image above.  It describes the general INFP writer. Weird déjà vu. I agreed with most, but not all of it. Which in itself seems to be a factor of the INFP personality. People are individuals, every single one of us. Yes, many of us do fit rather neatly into boxes – such as those defining personality traits. However sometimes we don’t, and that is okay because we’re all unique people. Just like you, there will never be another me.

    Onward! A little dissatisfied with the elements on the image that don’t fit my own perception of myself, I continued my research into me. After a few false starts I found a really wonderful website called “Write with Personality”. The website is run by a lady named Andrea J. Wenger, who you can find on Twitter as @AndreaJWenger. Her site is full of amazing information.  It is definitely worth visiting.  Andrea’s site also happens to contain a page dedicated to me!

    {Okay, okay… the page isn’t really dedicated to me, but to my Myers-Briggs Personality type. Namely the INFP.  Close enough I say! :)}.

    Andrea’s description of the INFP writer is insightful and startlingly accurate. Reading it felt as though someone who knew me better than I know myself had written a description of me. I learnt a lot about myself reading it, especially about my bad habits. {Yes, I was as shocked as you to learn I have more than a few of those!}

    The most striking of those bad habits is how I discovered I really am unconcerned with “the facts”. To my mind, facts are irrelevant little things behind which deceitful people often hide. The facts are used to distort things as often as they are used to prove points of view. To me, facts are only important when used as guide-marks toward truths. However, it is also apparent how my disregard of hard and fast facts is not shared by the majority of humanity. I should probably work harder trying to understand why facts are more important than feelings to so many. I probably should…

    After reading all about me {isn’t ourself a fascinating subject for almost every human?}, I decided to build my own image of myself as an INFP writer. The most difficult thing about doing this wasn’t being honest, which I find easy. No, it was using explicit words to describe myself, which I find extremely difficult since it feels so strongly like blowing my own trumpet.

    Individual characteristics of an INFP writer, namely me!
    Individual characteristics of an INFP writer, namely me!

    Regardless of my discomfort, my version of my #INFP me appears above.

    {PS. If you’d like to find out just how incredibly accurate the Myers-Briggs personality profile is, at least in my case and regarding my writing, head on over to the free sample of Beltamar’s War. I hope it entices you into purchasing my work!}

  • I love you today.

    Rituals are important things, they grant us a sense of peace in a troubled world.

    One of my favorite rituals is something I share with my wife. Since it means a lot to me, I’m going to share it with you.

    Every day that passes, I try hard to tell my wife, “I love you today.”

    Some days, when I’m not sure if I have followed this ritual, I’ll ask her, “Did I tell you I love you today?” After giving the question due consideration, she either responds with, “I think you did”, or “Not today.” Since her short term memory is infinitely better than mine I usually bow to her recollection and either say nothing, or correct my lapse by saying, “I love you today.”

    Today I failed to follow my ritual before leaving home for work, so instead of asking her directly I sent her a text that read, “Love you today. 🙂”.

    She replied by text, as she sometimes verbally does, with “Only today ??”

    I am more of a writer than a talker, so her text gave me a chance to frame my thoughts in words. My worded thoughts, {refined, as is an author’s right,} appear below. They try and explain why this particular ritual is important to me. I hope they make you think about love, about the things that are important to you, and about the people and living creatures that make your todays bearable.

    Only today… I love you today, for today is the day that truly matters.

    Only Tomorrow…  Only tomorrow might never come, so do today the things you may not get to do tomorrow.

    Only yesterday… I love you every yesterday, for our shared yesterdays are the containers of our deceased todays.

    Now let me ask you this. Where do you spend your time – in the present that every today is, or in imagined tomorrows that may never come?

  • Reciprocation.

    They say that love makes the world go around, and in a way they are correct. However, to be fully correct perhaps the saying should say, “Reciprocated love makes the world go around.”

    Reciprocation requires more than a single participant. Everything is life is reciprocal, we begin teaching this lesson to our children at a very young age, and hopefully we never stop teaching them, and ourselves, that the act of receiving is improved by the act of giving.

    The lesson doesn’t seem tough, yet so many either forget it or grow to believe that they should receive a little more than they give. Think about that for a moment and you’ll realize this thinking inevitably leads to imbalance. If everyone takes just a little more than they receive, who are they taking it from?

    For someone to gain, another must give.

    Give as much as you get, and balance will return to our chronically unbalanced world.

    Which brings me to the reason for this post. I recently joined a Book Club that goes by the Twitter hashtag #RaveReviewsBookClub. The unique premise of this club is that in order to become a member, and remain a member in good standing, you must read and review the works of other members.

    And there it is. A book club where you do for others, and others will do for you. The essence of reciprocation.

    If you are either a writer or a reader, please consider joining this book club. The club has a wide range of great works by a growing number of independent authors. Whatever your personal preference might be Rave Reviews Book Club has something for you.

    Tempted? Great, then click this link, join the club, visit the blogs and when you’re done vote for the post you enjoy most.

    Let the reciprocation begin!

    {P.S. I would be honored if you mentioned me as your sponsor should you decide to join!  I would be doubly honored if you decided to review my work, “Beltamar’s War” as part of your membership dues, however that decision I leave entirely to you.  Good reading!}

  • Two books for the price of {N}one!

    What is Malmaxa?

    That is a remarkably difficult question to answer.  Malmaxa is my vision of a perfect world, filled with imperfect people.  Malmaxa is my Philosophy, couched as Epic Fantasy.  Malmaxa isn’t poetry, however a little free form poem I wrote captures a few of its most essential elements.  The poem appears below.  Perhaps it is first proof of my claim that Malmaxa is like nothing you’ve ever read…

    ~ Malmaxa ~
    ~
    ~ How would a just world be? ~
    No rich, and no poor.
    No government, and no governed.
    No served, and no servants.
    No clergy, and no lay.
    No owner, and no slave.
    No one able to force you to their way.
    No one to prevent you having your say.
    In two words, no disparity.
    ~
    A just world might seem harsh.
    Death would be an end, and a new start.
    Cherished symbols, would be etched in flesh.
    There would be war, with no victory.
    Neither peon, nor royalty.
    Wealth, yet no poverty.
    Farmers, but no famished.
    ~
    A just world is a world where
    loving family are all around.
    Where to be free, we must be bound.
    Where children are safe to play.
    Where people may move, or choose to stay.
    Where cruelty exists, but is held at bay.
    Where none are forced away.
    Where character is held in high esteem.
    Where we all must fulfill our dream.
    Where while lineage means everything,
    it means nothing too.
    Where we must be who we are,
    not who our parents were.
    Where coins are bartered,
    they are not spent.
    Where prophetic dreams,
    from the Gods are sent.
    ~

    A “free” offer.

    Is any offer ever really free?  Not in my experience, however the one I’m making here might only cost you your time.  Your time… the most precious commodity any of us possess.

    We all like to receive something for nothing, yet on that something we generally place little value.  After all isn’t something we get for nothing too often worth precisely what we paid for it?  Okay, stage set, here is my offer…

    Two books, for the price of {N}one.  If you subscribe to Amazon Prime you can check out Beltamar’s War for free, that’s the “none”. Otherwise you have to buy, that’s the “one”.

    But that’s only one book!  Why does my offer say two books?  I am quite proud of saying what I mean, and being mean in what I say. {Or is that “meaning what I say”?}  So yes, I do mean two books for the price of {N}one.  How do you get the second book? Simple, by wanting it.  Once you’ve read Beltamar’s War you’ll know if you want to continue reading the tale.  If you do, then all you need to do to get the second book in the series, is ask for it.

    And how do you ask for it, you ask?  I’m glad you asked!  Post a review on either Amazon or GoodReads, reply to this thread, and tell me how to find your review.  While I ask you to be as honest as you’re able, I make no stipulations on how you rate the work. Replying here gives me your email address, I’ll check out your review, and I’ll send you a Kindle eBook version of Malmaxa II – The Pilgrimage as soon as it completes the editing phase.  Currently that should to be in August 2014.

    Beltamar's War
    Amazon Kindle
    Beltamar's War
    Paperback

    And thus you’ll have two complete books for the price of {N}one!
    This offer will expire, so please act now.

    As an additional incentive, you’ll also have the second book in the series in your hands for at least 30 days before it becomes accessible to the public.

    Still not sold on a potentially zero cost item?  You’re a person after my own heart!  Don’t do anything at all until you decide Malmaxa is for you.  But how can you decide that?  Hop on over to the sample, right here on my blog, and start reading.  The browser you’re using right now is all you need.

    However, before you start reading, be warned.

    {You knew there had to be a catch, didn’t you? There isn’t.} Malmaxa is not what it seems.  It is complicated.  It is metaphoric.  It is foreign.  It is harsh. It is forgiving, and unforgiving.  It is unique.  Malmaxa is quite literally like nothing else you have ever read.

    One of the things I can’t abide is the statement of opinions as facts.  But didn’t I just do that?  I said, “Malmaxa is quite literally like nothing else you have ever read.”  Yes, I stated that as a fact, and yes, I stand behind it.  Read Malmaxa, see the words between the lines, and compare it to any other work of any kind you’ve ever read – you’ll find differences both dramatic and subtle.

    Thank you for your time. Should you take me up on this offer, I hope that not only does Malmaxa raise questions worth pondering, but that you also enjoy my literal world. ~ Charles

  • Time

    A friend recently asked me, indirectly, how I like to spend my time.  The actual question framed was this, “I must ask though, why don’t you enjoy being outdoors as much as you used to?”

    Why don’t I enjoy being outdoors as much as I used to?

    I love looking at beautiful things, provided I am in the company of people I like. There is something about beauty that demands it be shared.  Time fleets away, when we’re young we mistakenly think we have an unlimited supply of that most precious thing. With each passing year we realize more that our time is finite, and we refine how we are willing to use it. Work begins to take far more than a just share, exhaustion another, duty another, all these voracious consumers of time hungrily eat away at our days and nights. What is left over, is all we have left to spend. Since we have so little we must become discerning. My choice of purchase with my time, is for the personal. Feelings and words shared with those we care about are far more precious to me than the most beautiful sight in the world, perceived alone.

    In my life I have seen many beautiful things, I’ve been to many amazing places, and I’ve seen more of the seven wonders of the world than many have, or ever will. How do my memories of those places and sights play?  They are all filled with the memories of those with whom I shared the sights, and those with whom I shared the sights feature more prominently within the memories than the beauty of the places themselves.

    Yes, beauty does lie in the eye of the beholder, but beauty demands to be shared and if it cannot be, I think beauty is somewhat lessened.

    Is beauty perceived alone as beautiful as beauty perceived together?

  • The Mistress of the Maze

    Ariadne, at the glorious age, of ten days…

    The Mistress of the Maze
    The Mistress of the Maze

  • Beltamar’s War. Re-Release!

    If you’re book reviewer I’d like to hear from you. If you’re a book reviewer who enjoys complex, thought provoking works like The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R Tolkien, or The Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan, I’d really love to hear from you!

    Yes, we’re all busy so how will you know if my work, Malmaxa, is for you? Easy, simply read the sample available right here, right in your web browser, right now.

    One of the nicest things about being an independent author is that we need never be content with our own words.
    -versus-
    One of the worst things about being an independent author is that it is very difficult to know when our own words no longer require refinement.

    I self-published the first novel in my series, Malmaxa, in June of 2012. Though I have been fortunate enough to garner good reviews, I’ve personally never been happy with it. It just wasn’t the best I felt it could be. So, with that in mind, I scraped together the money to have the work professionally edited. I engaged the fine folk at Warneke Reading for this task and have spent the last couple of months implementing their excellent suggestions. Ed and Natalie went far beyond what I felt was due. I say, without reservation, that the work they have done for me far exceeds the worth of the money I paid them.

    Naturally, during my implementation of their edits, I re-read Beltamar’s War. That was a mistake for two reasons.  One, I’m a man well past middle age, brought up to believe that men should not cry…  Two, I realized I am not happy with my own writing, and I doubt I ever will be. And thus the purpose of this post…

    Very soon I’ll be re-submitting the latest version of “Malmaxa I – Beltamar’s War” to Amazon. I’d love to build up a head of steam by getting the work into the hands of reviewers before I do so. Are you a reviewer interested in reading Malmaxa before it becomes available in its newest incarnation?  If so DM your email address, along with your preference of Kindle .MOBI or .PDF, to me on Twitter.  You can find me as @CGAyling, and yes, I do follow back. If you’re not on Twitter, you can contact me by replying to this post.

    But be warned, Malmaxa is not what it seems.

  • Why do Independent Authors Need Honest Reviews?

    Genuine people who are willing to take their time to write honest reviews are all too hard to find. Reviewing is a thankless task. Yes, the reviewer might get a free book, but for the amount of time they spend that can’t be considered compensation.

    Sadly, honest reviewers seldom publish reviews on works they dislike. Why sadly? Because in the Amazon age we are inundated with 5 star reviews that almost invariably purport to love the works of whatever author they are supposedly reviewing. There should be balance in all things. To expect everyone to love your work is a pipe dream.  Yet this seems to be the case – especially in the so-called “reviews” posted about independent authors’ works.

    Independent authors need honest reviews more than they need fabulous, yet fake ones. If we are lucky enough to get any reviews at all, we really need them to be honest. Why? For a number of reasons:

    Because…

    • Honesty really is the best policy.
    • We learn more from adversity than from success.
    • We deserve a level playing field, and so do our readers.
    • If your readers actually like your writing, they’ll ignore bad reviews, or laugh at them, and who doesn’t need a good laugh?
    • People naturally root for the underdog, and bad reviews can make you the underdog.
    • Honest reviews help authors improve their skills.
    • They help readers find books they will probably enjoy, and save them from wasting their time on books they won’t.
    • Positive reviews point out our strengths, and encourage us to play toward them.
    • Negative reviews highlight our weaknesses, and show where we should strive for improvement.
    • If our writing is really as atrocious as genuine bad reviews indicate, then we probably shouldn’t be publishing. Either at all, or until we’ve substantially improved our writing.
    • Pats on the back don’t propel you forward, they hold you back. Especially when those pats are leading us to buy into the delusion we’re good at something when we really aren’t.
    • Potential readers often look at reviews before deciding whether to buy. If they read a glowing review, then buy the book only to discover it is a pile of garbage then every review they read later is tainted.

    So you see, there really is no such thing as an honest review that is bad. Honest reviews either promote our work, or they help us improve it.

    We independent authors already have a well-deserved reputation for producing writing that falls far short of anything published by a traditional publishing house. The more “great” reviews that promote sub-standard work, the worse this will be for all – writers and readers alike.

    I take my hat off to real reviewers everywhere.  I’ve written a couple of reviews myself, and I know just how difficult it is to capture the essence of a work without spoiling it for the readers. In case you’re interested to read a couple of those I’ve written, here are two: Godspeed, by February Grace.  The Sowing, by Amira Makansi.

    If you’d like to read reviews written about my work, well you might find the ones I particularly like here.

    But the real bottom line?

    Don’t waste your valuable time reading reviews at all.  Don’t let someone else tell you what you’ll like and what you won’t.  Instead of reading flagrantly positive reviews from questionable sources you should never trust, read the free sample every single reputable publishing system provides. Make up your own mind about the quality of the writing.  You’ll be giving the real underdogs, namely independent authors, a chance by doing so.  You’ll be glad you did when you uncover a gem in the midden {yes, you may have to wade through a lot of excrement, but that will make the gem that much more beautiful when you find it :)}.

    And now, let me put my words where my mouth is… a sample of my first book is available right here, right now, right in your browser, completely free, with no download necessary, and no troublesome returns either.

    By the way, if you’re a reviewer I’d love you to look at my work with as critical an eye as you wish.  I am nearing the end of implementing edits on Beltamar’s War right now and would love to send you a fresh off the editing block copy in the electronic medium of your choice, PDF or .MOBI {Indeed I’ve just taken hours of that editing time to post this.}  If I can tempt you to review me, please visit [Reviewers], where you’ll find information on how to contact me.

    Further thoughts on authors like Ben Coulter

    …and his ilk.  Those who compound the problem of blatantly biased reviews by going to extreme lengths in attempt to silence anyone who might give them a bad review, thus ensuring they never get bad reviews.  And when they do get bad reviews, they then go to extraordinary lengths to discredit such reviews.

    What sort of extremes? Well, read about Coulter’s behavior here.

  • Submissive, to Society.

    Does society serve us, or do we serve society?

    In a conversation with a female friend she mentioned how she had been brought up to be submissive.  I felt an inexplicable pleasure at this and since I believe inexplicable deserves explanation, it set me to thinking.  The rather shame filled results of those thoughts appear below.

    There are powerful feelings embedded in words like submissive.  Powerful things I have realized are not all the good we’re raised to believe they are.  As a boy, I was trained to not show emotion, to “be strong”.

    What a crock of nonsense!

    Being strong bears no relationship whatsoever to our ability to suppress emotion.  Yet our loving parents are so conned by an uncaring, manipulative society that they raise their kids to fit neatly into predefined stereotypical roles.  Roles that religion reinforces to the benefit of a system structured to churn out obedient, unthinking thralls who will marry, and raise another generation of obedient, unthinking thralls.

    Society makes me sick.

    So why did my hearing a woman admit to being submissive make me feel good?  Because just like her, I’ve been raised in a stereotypic fashion.  My parents loved me, yet they also raised me to believe men should be dominant and women submissive.  That is wrong.

    It is incredibly difficult to break the mold in which we were shaped. If we’re to achieve a system where people actually matter more than their ability to serve society till they’re worn out…  If we’re to achieve a family that serves for more than churning out another generation for corporate mills or uncaring governments to use and discard…  If we’re to achieve something that matters then we must break the mold in which our characters where formed.

    We must teach our children that what lies in their hearts is theirs to decide, not ours to determine.  We must teach our children that they are valued, that they are loved, and that they are free. We must teach them to question, not to obey.  We must teach them that they are free to chart a course outside of the serfdom society needs to keep its skewed systems functioning.  They must learn that they are free to chart a course to happiness, wherever and with whomever they find it.  We must teach them that their happiness cannot be at the expense of others, and that if they are to matter then they must treat everyone they meet as also mattering.

    Both you and I have shackles we must break.  Those shackles bind us into a society of extreme disparity where the vast majority serve, and the miniscule minority do not.  Those shackles demand that we train our children to obedience over thought.  Those shackles are what make us favor the normal over the unique.  Those shackles make us value inanimate material objects over living beings.  Those shackles bind us, and in return they grant us nothing but an illusion of safety.  Those shackles don’t even attempt to grant us an illusion of dignity.

    I am no man’s servant.  Are you?

    Instead of clinging to an illusion of freedom let us cling instead to the hope of an understanding love.

  • Wonders of Nature.

    Julia accompanied me on a drive down to the hardware store to get some in-wall mounts for power receptacles {you can never have enough power, right?}. When I say I’m going somewhere and ask if anyone wants to come, Julia is the voice that answers. We take the time together to share thoughts from the mundane to the philosophic.

    On the drive there, Julia informed me that one of the things she would really like to see during her life, is the Baobab tree. Well, having been born and raised in the very country that is home to this amazing giant, I described my memories of the Baobab to her. Its strange glossy gray skin, how it feels almost slippery yet is completely dry. How it really has no wood per se, just a very compact fibrous makeup that feels woody but is not. We discussed creme of tartar, and the fruit pods from which the real McCoy {or the real McCoy as far as I’m concerned} is extracted. The Baobab really is a wonder of nature.

    Food for thought.

    Wandering around the store for a few minutes granted my mind the respite it needs to ruminate on the topic of discussion. For whatever reason, this became thoughts on the wonders of nature.

    Within nature, everything is a wonder.

    From the smallest living organisms to the largest. For inanimate, dead dust, to brilliant gems cut to reveal the reflected lights of the universe hidden within.  From the insignificant things we never see and seldom consider, to the most magnificent we personally encounter.

    For me far and away the most majestic, to the point of being a spiritual encounter, is the Giant Redwood. This magnificent tree is now limited to small parts of the north-western coastal area of the continental U.S.A.  Over 95% of the original old growth redwoods have been cut down and used for timber. Probably the only reason the Giant Redwoods have been spared this fate is that, as far as timber goes, Giant Redwoods are terrible. Their wood is unsuitable for construction, and there isn’t enough profit to be made from felling them for firewood.

    Magnificence, saved not for its wonder, but because man can’t consume it. How sad man can’t see past his own immediate needs, or the potential for profit, and grant all of nature the respect it deserves?

    So, if you do visit the U.S.A. the thing I would recommend seeing, over any other, is the Giant Redwood tree. Forget the Grand Canyon, New York City, Niagara Falls, and Las Vegas. Each of those has been ruined by commercialism. If you want to experience something truly majestic and life-altering, then stand beneath one of nature’s magnificent creations. {Yes, I would as gladly stand beneath a micro-organism, and would likely perceive equivalent magnificence within it, but sometimes size does indeed modify our perception.}

    As you stand beneath a Giant Redwood and gaze upwards you will feel time slow, the suddenly indecently hasty rush of blood through your veins, you will feel the earth alive and altering beneath your feet, and you will see the sky move, even if there is not a cloud in sight.  The feeling of life, of living, of being, I had when I did this was literally awe inspiring.  Will your experience similar things?  I can’t promise you will, but if all you do is sit in an air-conditioned car as you drive through one, sparing but an irritated, quick glance skyward as its shadow consumes the smartphone which so avidly holds your attention… Well, I can assure that then, you won’t.

    We humans are here for the span of a hundred years, if we are exceptionally long lived. Giant Redwoods are here for two thousand.  Some stood hundreds of feet tall even as Rome fell.  Let us not permit the mightiest of known living entities left on earth to fall because man finds something he can exploit with their demise.

    That would be a true tragedy, and mankind has visited enough tragedy upon humanity and our wonderful, wounded earth already.