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Don’t worry daughter, one day you’ll be as good at finding things as your mother is at hiding them… http://t.co/7sGYK1gj

— C.G.Ayling (@CGAyling) October 5, 2012

My youngest daughter was in a foul mood this morning, seems our wicked house had conspired to hide her shoes – all searches had failed, with no clues on the whereabouts of the missing footwear.  Since I’ve been the victim of similar malign intent on far too many occasions, I attempted to console her – I failed, Julia’s determination to remain angry prevailed…

Though my wife expressed deplorable disinterest in our beloved daughter’s plight, in passing she casually inquired if Julia had showered the previous evening.  “Yes”, Julia grouched.

Two minutes later an evidently satisfied mother returned bearing the errant red shoes.  Suspicious at the speed with which my wife had solved the unsolvable, I turned to Julia and said “Don’t worry daughter, one day you’ll be as good at finding things as your mother is at hiding them…”  Julia’s face cracked, along with her bad mood as she responded “Good one, dad.”

My wife has an almost uncanny ability at finding the things our house goes to such lengths to hide.  Indeed, a little too good…  I’m not ashamed to admit I’ve often accused her of being adept at hiding things in plain sight.

With Julia’s crisis averted, my wife seized opportunity to explain her system of echo-location, “Finding things is simple really, just visualize the object you’re looking for – its size, shape and color, then restrict your search to only that.  Another thing that helps, is backtracking where you last remember having the item.”

I nodded sage agreement, as though I too used these very tactics.  Secretly I thought, “Explain magic any way you will, witch!  I’m on to you – you’re in cahoots with the house…”

 

I took advantage of early voting and wanted to share my choices, and my reasoning behind voting the way I did.

Before I begin, let me say a few things about myself.  I’m very conservative, and believe strongly in personal freedom, offset by personal responsibility.  I’m an independent and consider anyone who votes purely along party lines to be both a dupe, and irresponsible.  They’re effectively abdicating their principle democratic freedom, namely the right to vote, to someone else.  Along with being a freedom, voting is also a responsibility – to evaluate the issues and make subjective personal choices about them.  By voting along party lines, you give away the keys to your kingdom.  Worse, the people to whom you relinquish your rights are biased, and make no bones about being so.

Considering what I’ve already said, you’ve probably already decided how you think I’ve voted – read on and find out how right you might [not] be.

In the interest of reducing the onset of potentially fatal boredom, I’ll restrict this post to the more important issues on my particular ballot.

President – Score: Barack Obama 0, Mitt Romney -9.  No contest, and not because I think Obama is doing a good job, actually I think he’s wasted an extravagant amount of my tax dollars and achieved precious little.  However, the thought of returning to the warmongering excesses of the previous eight years is frightening – I definitely don’t want to go back to the way things were.  Romney’s every word shows him to be a rich man with no intention of paying his fair share.  I am yet to hear what his “plan” to turn things around is.  Here, let me click my fingers and create 12 million jobs – there you are, 12 million jobs created!  Oh dear, what’s that strange gassy sound – could it be the sound of virtual reality deflating…?  Nope, in good conscience I just can’t cast a vote for someone who clearly has no plan worth sharing on how to solve the financial debacle in which we currently find ourselves – sorry, but giving yourself and your cronies a fat tax cut isn’t a “plan”.  My litany of negatives against Romney goes on, and on, and on but that is the main issue I have with him.  Bottom line, I’m not voting for Obama – I’m voting against Romney.

When the best choice is the lesser of two evils, it is time to re-evaluate and restate the question.

— C.G.Ayling (@CGAyling) October 1, 2012

U.S. Senate – Score: Sherrod Brown 5, Josh Mandel -20.  I have no problems with the way Sherrod Brown has voted on any of the major issues.  I have massive reservations as to the character and integrity of Josh Mandel – whom I consider to be an incompetent Treasurer of State desperately trying to buy his way into the “old boys’ club” using political cronyism as coin.  Mandel is too young, and too evidently prone to corruption.

U.S. House of Representatives – Score: Pat Tiberi 8, Jim Reese 0.  I find Pat Tiberi to be fiscally conservative and generally responsible, my only real concern is his tendency to blur the lines between church and state.  I know virtually nothing about Jim Reese.

Ohio House – Score: Donna O’Connor 5, Mike Duffey 0.  I found much more information available on what Donna O’Connor stands for than I could for Mike Duffey.  Donna’s goals align well with my own, she is a long time teacher (a profession for which I hold the highest esteem), and she seems concerned by the unashamed bias toward the wealthy evidenced in current Ohio politics.  From impartial information I can discern, Mike Duffey is just a politician, (a profession for which I hold low esteem).  In a way I am sorry to see Donna transition from a laudable profession into the mud-pit of politics, but I wish her well.

State Issue 1 – Convention To Revise, Alter, Or Amend The Ohio Constitution. No.

State Issue 2 – State-Funded Commission To Draw Legislative And Congressional Districts. Yes, right now there is frantic gerrymandering by the winners of each Ohio election as they seek to ensure their supporters get an unfair advantage in the next election.  Both parties are guilty of this abhorrent behavior.  Voting “yes” on Issue 5 changes this into a more efficient and equitable system.

State Issue 48 – Dublin City School District, Bond and Tax Levy.  Yes.  Dublin Schools are some of the highest rated in the nation, I don’t want to see that change.

State Issue 56 – Franklin County Office on Aging, Tax Levy. Yes.  It takes money to provide services to the aged, who deserve to be treated with dignity.

~C.G.Ayling – Please, take the time to vote, and vote as your conscience dictates.

In response to a comment by Tina Onu on my seldom visited FaceBook page, which read “When is the next book out? I have finished reading the second book and I felt cheated because it ended and I wanted the rest of the story.”

Hi Tina, thanks for commenting. I’m pleased to hear you want the rest of the story, and saddened you feel cheated.

If history teaches us anything, it is that we seldom learn from history – bearing that lesson in mind, it took me almost a year to release the second novel.  Assuming that faulty precedent, I anticipate releasing the third novel in the series around May of 2013 – however, I must warn you that though you will have a much deeper understanding of Malmaxa, Book III is unlikely to complete the tale of the Seizen and the multiple characters I hope you are coming to know.

As you no doubt realize, Malmaxa is a very complicated story.  I like to think of it more along the lines of tapestry formed by the threads each of the multiple storylines within the whole comprise.  Once these threads successfully merge into a coherent whole, Malmaxa will be revealed.

You haven’t experienced truly unconditional love until you’ve been chosen by a dog.

We have a dog named “Bacon”.  My wife and daughter found her at the pound, a wondrous place that offers loving animals to caring people.  After bringing home this miniscule puppy, which nestled neatly within the palm of my hand, we soon entered naming negotiations…

My wife and middle daughter were advocating the name “Blondie”.   After a single look at the little dog comfortably sleeping in my hand, I decided that since she so strongly resembled a piece of bacon, “Bacon” would be more appropriate.  My wife then made the mistake of calling a family vote.  {A mistake, since I have no qualms about manipulating matters to suit myself. :)}.

With my wife, Suzanne, and our middle daughter, Dannielle, comfortably resting upon the laurels of a sure win, I took my son and youngest daughter aside, in order to explain the obscure construct of “voting” to them.

“A vote,” I explained, “is a great thing.  Everyone’s opinion counts equally.  It’s nothing like normal, where your Mom makes the decisions and we all pretend to like it.”

Both nodded sage agreement.

Having adeptly planted the seeds of discontent, I went on to explain a little about the nature of the particular vote we were so lucky to have, “We get to choose the name for our new dog!  Your mom and sister want to name her Blondie…”  I paused to let them grant this preposterous suggestion the scant consideration it was due.

They looked at me as if to ask, ‘Is that not a fine name for a dog?’

I nodded slowly before continuing “… which is a perfectly good name for a dog, after all many people have named their dogs ‘Blondie’.”  They smiled, and nodded.  This was true.

“But…”  Both immediately recognized the caveat they so often used to explain that which was self-evident to any reasonable person.  With their full attention upon me, I went on “…but since she is a unique dog, maybe she should have a unique name.”  A pause, and a smile as I conjured the dog’s image with words,  “She looks just like a piece of fresh bacon, doesn’t she?”

Two nods of agreement.  She did indeed look very much like a piece of fresh bacon – pristine white streaked with bits of pinkish brown.

Content, I said no more and waited till my wife called “the vote.”

I remained silent as Suzanne smiled knowingly at our favorite middle daughter, before saying, “We’re voting to name the dog.  Everyone who thinks ‘Blondie’ is a good name, raise your hand.”  Perfectly on cue two hands raised, Suzanne’s and Dannielle’s.

Into the wide eyed surprise of my wife, I quickly said, “Or if you think ‘Bacon’ is better, then wait.”

Only two hands remained raised, and thus did our dog win her name – Bacon.

Bacon loves us all.  Yet some, she loves more equally than others.

If you haven’t been adopted by a dog, take yourself off to your nearest animal shelter and see if one might bark for you.

Does spin never take a back seat with you, Mr. Akin?  Now you wish to further capitalize on your reprehensible comments about “legitimate rape” by running an advertisement that asks us to forgive you for using “the wrong words”?

You might gain some modicum of sympathy if you were contrite and asked for forgiveness for your stupidity, or simply for making such an appalling and callous remark.  Instead you reveal your true colors – you don’t give a hoot about the victims of rape – namely the women who are raped.  No, you are now apologizing for using the wrong words in the wrong way.  I notice Mr. Akin doesn’t say “I was wrong.”  No, it’s the words that were wrong – not Mr. Akin…

In his apology advert, Mr. Akin says “I have a compassionate heart for the victims of sexual assault. I pray for them.”  How generous!  Your prayers go a long way toward compensating them for the very real cost of the pregnancy and delivery (by the way, that is a cost in cold hard cash).  Your prayers go nearly as far in emotional reparations – in other words, precisely nowhere.

Later in the advert, Mr. Akin states “The mistake I made was in the words I said, not in the heart I hold. I ask for your forgiveness.”  Again, you lay the blame on the words, not the person speaking them.  As to your plea for forgiveness, this is my answer:-

To err is human, to forgive divine, since I am human you don’t get mine!

Mr. Akin, I don’t believe you are worthy of forgiveness until you acknowledge YOU are wrong – completely and utterly wrong.  Perhaps others see this the same way as me, perhaps not.  The polls will tell, and it’s pretty obvious the polls are the only thing you truly care about.

While driving to work yesterday morning, I overheard a snippet on the radio about someone who said that raped women could somehow prevent themselves becoming pregnant.  I was appalled, so I researched it last night.

I’m blogging about it now because, sadly, this kind of unmitigated nonsense has a nasty way of being spun until it disappears from existence over time.  The following is my personal opinion, as is every other post I write.

The fool who alleged this nonsense turned out to be Missouri Congressman Todd Akin.  Since I like knowing the facts, I took the time to listen to precisely what he said, and the tone and context in which he said it.  (Mr. Akin is already trying to put spin on this, my comments on that later).

I transcribed exactly what I heard, becoming more and more appalled with each pass through the audio (I’m a terrible typist and had to listen to his bile at least twenty times.)  For those of you interested it is on the “Jaco Report”, starting at about the 4:00 minute mark in the second clip on http://fox2now.com/2012/08/19/the-jaco-report-august-19-2012/

They are talking about the circumstances in which abortion should be legal.

Interviewer: What about in the case of rape, should it be legal or not?

Congressman Todd Akin: “Well, you know, uhh uhh people always want to try and make that as how do ya, how do ya slice this particularly tough sort of ethical question.  It seems to me, first of all from what I understand from doctors that’s really rare, if it’s a legitimate rape the female body has a way of shutting that whole thing down.”

My comments:  I’m disgusted about everything Mr. Akin said.

Firstly, the question is a simple one.  Should abortion be legal in the case of rape?  This is NOT a “particularly tough sort of ethical question”.  It is an extremely simple question, that a simple Yes, or No serves perfectly well to answer.  You are being asked for your opinion, Mr Akin.   Yes, or No?

Next. “It seems to me, first of all from what I understand from doctors that’s really rare,…”  Mr. Akin allegedly got this “information” from doctors, plural?  OK, bring out these doctors and let them turn into pariahs, just as you are rapidly and most deservedly becoming.

Next.  “if it’s a legitimate rape”  Rape is NEVER legitimate.

Next. “the female body has a way of shutting that whole thing down.”  No. Just NO!  The bodies of female mammals do not have natural, inherent mechanisms to prevent pregnancy, other than abstinence.  If both parties are fertile at the time of intercourse, the female is likely to become pregnant.  Yes, she may spontaneously abort if the fetus is not viable, but she has no control over that either.  She cannot shut down “that whole thing”. What grade level are you Mr. Akin?  Does using stupid euphemisms like “that whole thing” do the question of rape and its long-term effects justice?

Mr. Akin later prepared and released a statement about the interview.  This was not an apology, but more political spin.  My comments appear in italics after each paragraph.

Akin, “As a member of Congress, I believe that working to protect the most vulnerable in our society is one of my most important responsibilities, and that includes protecting both the unborn and victims of sexual assault.  In reviewing my off-the-cuff remarks, it’s clear that I misspoke in this interview and it does not reflect the deep empathy I hold for the thousands of women who are raped and abused every year.  Those who perpetrate these crimes are the lowest of the low in our society and their victims will have no stronger advocate in the Senate to help ensure they have the justice they deserve.”

If you believe protecting the vulnerable is important, then get off your high horse and do it – by starting with the women who are raped.

Your remarks were not “off-the-cuff”, I listened to what you said over twenty times and there is no doubt in my mind that you had prepared and rehearsed every word.

“the thousands of women who are raped and abused every year” WOW!!!!  What universe do you live in Mr. Akin, because is not the one the Earth occupies.  Thousands of women?  Millions would be much closer to the mark.

“Those who perpetrate these crimes are the lowest of the low” – I agree.  Precisely what do you intend to do about these “thousands” of criminals, Mr. Akin?  Oh – you are more interested in punishing their victims than the rapists?

“their victims will have no stronger advocate in the Senate” – than whom?  Certainly not Mr. Akin, who truly believes the punishment for being the victim of rape should last said victim her entire life.

Akin, “I recognize that abortion, and particularly in the case of rape, is a very emotionally charged issue.  But I believe deeply in the protection of all life and I do not believe that harming another innocent victim is the right course of action. I also recognize that there are those who, like my opponent, support abortion and I understand I may not have their support in this election.”

“I do not believe that harming another innocent victim is the right course of action” – sounds laudable… unfortunately the REAL victim, namely the woman who was raped, has to carry the reminder of that crime for the rest of her life.  Compelling her to do so is far beyond cruel, it is abhorrent and despicable.

“I also recognize that there are those who, like my opponent, support abortion and I understand I may not have their support in this election.” –  what an OFFENSIVE statement.  I absolutely do not support abortion and your inference that I do offends me deeply.  Nobody I know supports abortion. Nobody!  What many of us support is a woman’s right to choose. As for my personal belief, it is that a pregnancy resulting from consensual sex between to committed loving adults is a wonderful thing to be cherished.  A pregnancy resulting from rape does not fall within those confines.

Furthermore, Mr. Akin, I would never dream of forcing my beliefs on any woman – she and her physician must live with their consciences in regard to any decision they make regarding abortion.

The rest of Mr. Akin’s statement had nothing to do with the issue of rape, and I will not include it here.

In summary, here is the Tweet I posted this morning:-

Legitimate rape? Unless sex is consensual, conscious, un-coerced and between adults, it is rape. Rape is never “legitimate”, Mr. Todd Akin.

I have very few people that I would truly term “friends”.  I have many acquaintances, and many people I like enough to spend hours or even days with.  But true friends?  Were I to count them in the age old method… well, suffice it to say I would have fingers to spare – on my first hand.

Now, I’m no social animal, and quite likely have fewer friendships than those who are – yet I don’t think the difference will be as great as might be imagined.

What is it that makes for true friendship?  Simply liking someone, and having them like you in return, is not enough.  The bond of friendship is far more powerful than that.

What other factors are needed, and how important are they?

Respect, vital.  Without respect you can’t possibly be real friends.  Losing respect destroys friendship.

Trust, critical.  Personally, I think this might be the most important element.  You have to be able to trust them not to judge you when you reveal your deepest, darkest secrets.

Time, important.  Friendship takes an investment of time – how much time is not as important as granting it when it’s needed.

Commitment, important.  This is tied to trust.  You have to remain committed to your friends, and know they are committed to you.  Commitment doesn’t mean they blindly take your side.  It means both of you are committed to the well-being of the other, and if you see the other making a poor choice you’ll warn, or even stop them.  A friend who remains silent when you do something stupid, is no friend at all.

One of the interesting things about the friendships I have and hold dear, is that massive periods of absence can pass with no contact.  Yet when we get back in touch, it’s like no time has passed at all, we simply pick up and carry on.

Friendship is truly special, treasure yours – however many, or few, you have.

The priorities people set are strange.  At almost any social gathering, the greetings exchanged between new acquaintances includes information about work.  “What do you do?”, or “I’m a blah blah de blah.”

Why are we defined by the work we do, and not the things we’ve done?  I’m as guilty of this foolishness as anyone.  For a long time I’ve chosen my jobs (including the one I’ve held for the last six years) for altruistic reasons, yet in so doing I’ve defined myself by the work I’m doing – not the things I do.