C.G.Ayling

Tag: marriage

  • Time, to write a wrong.

    Time past righting a wrong, and this my writing of this wrong, in poetic form.

    Marriage Equality.
    Religion’s Organized Refrain.
    You must believe as we, or heathen will you be.
    Don’t confuse the faithful with your lies
    don’t dare to make them open, their dogma shuttered eyes.
    Marriage is a word most meaningful,
    that has but one design,
    its only purpose is fruitful copulation
    with other gendered, of your kind.
    How dare the unbelievers, take our holy word
    and twist, and turn it into something so absurd
    as love between two people,
    without bias for gender,
    Without honor for… our holy word.
    Love, for one of your own gender?
    Absurd!
    For anyone who dares use reason from their own brain
    You must show contempt,
    and haughty disdain.
    ~
    Reason’s Refrain.
    You proclaim your god is mighty, loving, and true,
    then by your deeds prove, his holy words mean nothing, to you.
    Twist the words written, that they might suit just you.
    Who are you to claim protection of the words you hold holy
    when by your efforts, you twist it into something so absurd
    as “love may only exist between those of opposite gender”.
    To thinkers, this obscenity, you dare to tender.
    Only when it suits you, do you quote your holy words.
    Often when it suits you, from context do you rip them,
    and with that deed, remove any true meaning.
    Picking and choosing, without gleaning
    any truth they might once have held.
    Guidance did they offer, words, like shalt… not must.
    Meanings long since forgotten, corrupted by man’s lust.
    Divinity is life, and life, divinity.
    Within our single life, we strive for love.
    We don’t know where we’ll find it,
    spiritually, not body bound, flowing from without.
    Or within the arms, of a mortal lover, maybe not devout.
    True love knows no season,
    true love doesn’t bow before dogmatic reason.
    It clasps you by the heart,
    and when it goes unrequited, it tears your afflicted soul apart.
    You claim you love your brothers, and yet you segregate
    you may not love another, whose gender yours does match.
    If the only purpose of marriage is procreation,
    then sinners are we all, without exemption.
    Marriage is a commitment, an everlasting bond.
    Marriage is not defined, by rigid little laws
    or rigid little people, without true, just, and fair cause.
    Does not marriage within in it hold love?
    Another simple, holy word…
    Love is not subject to reason,
    Love does not flinch before distrust,
    Love does not fail before mis-reason,
    nor bow before the discrimination,
    of this misguided nation
    The only thing, before which love kneels, is the claimer of your heart,
    who love has brought together, let no one tear apart
    ~
    Logic’s Refrain
    No law that is not equal, should be tendered, as true.
    No exceptions should we make
    that  within our laws entomb, foul discrimination.
    As anyone can see, this must be folly
    this, cannot be…
    divinity.
    Any decent person must demand…
    Marriage Equality.
    ~

     {I make no apologies for my changed views on Marriage. If you’re interested in the motivations of a contrary man, you may read my tale of enlightenment here, and here.}

  • Same-Sex Marriage.

    The US Supreme Court is currently considering cases regarding a touchy, emotive subject. Namely the question of the veracity of same-sex marriage.  Unfortunately, I don’t do well when I’m troubled by thoughts of injustice, and this subject is rampant with such thoughts.

    Until relatively recently, my view was that the word “marriage” should be reserved for the specific union between a man and a woman.  {For those interested in my change of heart, my post, “Marriage,  a word’s meaning” provides a little background.}

    Why did I change my mind?  Because of prompting from my youngest daughter {thirteen at the time}, who expressed shock I could be opposed to same-sex couples.  I corrected her by stating I had never held that bigoted viewpoint, then went on to explain that we were talking about the meaning of a root word, namely marriage.

    Though I wish I could remember Julia’s exact words, I cannot, so here’s the gist of how she prompted my change of heart, “That doesn’t make sense, dad.  Words change their meaning all the time.  Just because people in the past were ignorant and had the wrong ideas doesn’t mean we’re stuck with what they thought something meant.  I think marriage is for couples who love each other and intend to be with each other forever.  What do you think?”

    How is it that the young see the truth of things so clearly?  Perhaps it is because they haven’t yet been trained to the biases of whatever society they dwell in?

    What could I do but agree?  Julia’s definition of “marriage” cuts to the heart of the matter.  Marriage is not about sex, or about gender.  Marriage, is about commitment.  No one, neither individual or government, has the right to deny any committed couple their chance at the permanent bond of marriage.

    So, since I’ve come to terms with my change of heart, why am I troubled by thoughts of injustice?  Simple.  Because I fear the US Supreme Court is about to allow a massive, long running injustice go unaddressed… or at best inadequately addressed.

    Sadly, the USA seems to be a country where the courts are less concerned with justice than they are in following the letter of flawed laws.  In reflecting on the technicalities of the matter of same-sex marriage, Justice Sonia Sotomayor seems to be following that precedent.  She asked this question, “If the issue is letting the states experiment and letting the society have more time to figure out its direction, why is taking a case now the answer?”

    Allow me, a gravely troubled citizen, to answer that question.  Because everyone deserves equal access to justice now, not at some unspecified time in the future.

    Many of the original European immigrants came to America to escape religious persecution.  Limiting marriage benefits and responsibility exclusively to heterosexual couples has no basis other than religious or politically motivated dogma.  How has this country been so sorely turned about that where it once held separation of Church and State as sacrosanct, it now seeks to entrench religious persecution into law?

    I don’t do well when I’m troubled by thoughts of injustice…  Withholding access to marriage equality from any committed couple, regardless of gender, is injustice.  As a strictly heterosexual male already past my silver wedding anniversary, and looking forward to my gold, I can only imagine how same sex couples denied access to equal rights feel.

    That very imagining troubles me.

    Same-sex couples are victims of persecution, oppression, and injustice.

    That needs to end, and it needs to end now, not at some other undetermined time in the future.

    The following is a quote from my work, Malmaxa. “Were those denied justice ever satisfied with their lot?”  Since the answer to that question is a resounding, “No!” we should not be surprised when same-sex couples aren’t satisfied with their lot.  Indeed, no moral person should be content to remain silent in any society that denies equal justice to all its citizens, regardless of gender, color, caste, creed, sexual orientation, origin, or religion.

    The time for silent social conscience on this issue is long since passed. Now is the time for social activism.

    {04/14/13 – further steps on this journey can be found here.}

  • Marriage, a word’s meaning.

    Marriage, a wonderful word ~ a worthy institution ~ a question, of meaning…

    Although I never thought anyone had the right to tell another who they can or can’t love,  long did I hold the belief that the word marriage defined a union between a man and a woman. Very recently I was thinking about this and realized that limiting this particular word to a narrow, archaic construct has a major impact on people – my belief that a word should be limiting, placed severe constraints on others.

    Who am I to tell anyone who chooses to make a commitment, that they cannot – simply because the one to whom they commit themselves is of the same gender? I don’t have that right, and if I did… well, I would cast it away.

    In the past, I would have voted for any type of civil union, regardless of its name. Yet, within my heart, I reserved the word marriage for only the variety of union in which I am bound. My way, is not the only right way.

    Now, I must open my closed mind and grant others, different from me, their chance at happiness, their chance at lifelong togetherness. Call it a civil union, call it a marriage, or simply call it by its true name… love.

    While none of us has any right to determine the lie of another’s heart, everyone deserves a chance at completion.  Well done Washington, for taking a leadership role amongst the United States, once more.

    {04/14/13 you can read more of my journey to understand the meaning of marriage, here.}